TikTokker has message for moms who make her ‘feel like crap’ for sending kids to day care

Every day, the internet gives us evidence that while we have a right to choose many things in life, strangers reserve the right to judge you.

In the parenting world, deciding to send your kids to daycare – or not – is a perfect example.

One mom has now spoken out against this shaming, noticing other parents often boast that they “could not be more grateful” that they don’t “have to put their kids in daycare.”

TikTokker mom Veronica says in a now viral clip: “I hate the narrative that if you send your kids to daycare, you’re not raising them.”


Young woman teacher sitting on the floor during a lesson with small nursery school children
One mom noticed other parents often boast that they “could not be more grateful” that they don’t “have to put their kids in daycare.” Getty Images

“We made sacrifices and she’s better for it”

Veronica continues:

“And people are like, ‘Oh, you know, we made some sacrifices, my kid used to have fun at Water Day, but now we go to the water park together and she’s better for it.’

“One, that’s not an option for every family. So, stop making moms feel like crap because they send their kids to daycare.

“Two, my kid freaking loves Water Day and daycare. In fact, she gets pissed when I pick her up ’cause she’s having fun with her friends.”

Veronica adds, “Three, she’s so, so smart because they teach her so many things there. So smart.

“And four, I’m raising her. Like, I’m instilling morals with her. I see her more than her daycare teacher sees her. I can raise her and she can still have fun at school.

“They’re not mutually exclusive like things. So this narrative, it’s gotta go. It’s not cute.”


TikTok user Veronica Friedman expressing her disagreement with the narrative that sending kids to daycare means not raising them
TikTokker mom Veronica says in a now viral clip: “I hate the narrative that if you send your kids to daycare, you’re not raising them.” TikTok / @vfrieds

“Daycare expands the village”

Most viewers of the clip agreed with Veronica.

“Daycare simply expands the village that helps your children thrive. It’s so good socially and doesn’t take away anything from parenting. It enriches it,” one wrote.

Another said, “My question to all the moms that feel that way, are they planning to stop raising their kids when they start kindergarten?”

This parent added, “It’s really frustrating when people assume daycare is something negative. I often say that we WANT her in school, she’s learning so much and has great social skills and independence.”

Then there were some who also added that SAHMs are often judged for using daycare: “I agree 100% but it’s kinda insane how much I’m shamed for being a SAHM. Why can’t we just do what we gotta do and stop judging each other?”

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