The Clear Signs Usher And His Ex-Wife Tameka Foster Don't Get Along

It’s gonna burn for Usher to say this, but he and his ex-wife Tameka Foster may not be the shining example of exes-turned-BFFs they hope the public believes they are — or at least not yet anyway. Granted, the pair did not exactly end on good terms, with their 2009 split mimicking a reality TV breakup, with a tumultuous custody battle for their kids Usher “Cinco” Raymond V and Naviyd Ely Raymond to boot. And while you’d think they’d have sorted things out by now, Usher’s speech at the 2024 BET Awards says otherwise — even a celebrity relationship expert thinks so.

In case you missed it, the “Yeah!” singer took the stage to grab his Lifetime Achievement Award and decided it was the perfect moment to spill his “confessions,” aka his commitment to becoming a better dad, especially to the kids he co-parents with Foster. While Foster has publicly claimed that things between them are good, Usher’s words hinted at ongoing tension. “You know we gotta be cool for the sake of the kids,” he said, adding that he’s looking up to Alicia Keys, Swizz Beatz, and his ex-wife, Mashonda Tifre, as co-parenting role models before addressing Foster directly: “I’m trying, Tameka.”

Some fans thought he was airing dirty laundry, and at such a public forum, no less, but Susan Trombetti, matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking, exclusively told Nicki Swift that it may just be Usher’s way of making some sort of pledge to be a better co-parenting partner to his ex-wife.

Usher may not have flat-out said it, but his statement at the 2024 BET Awards makes it clear he’s not exactly besties with Tameka Foster. According to relationship expert Susan Trombetti, it seems he wants the world to know he’s making an effort to make amends, especially given their messy past and nasty divorce.

“I think the comment says more about Usher than his ex-wife. I think it’s more meant as a nod to her that he hasn’t been the easiest to get along with or always the best co-parent, but exactly as he states, he is ‘trying.’ I think he meant that this is a work in progress,” she exclusively told Nicki Swift. “While I am never for airing your dirty laundry in public, this is nothing compared to what the two have already done, so people are making more out of it than he meant.”

To be fair, it’s not like Foster has said anything bad about Usher’s parenting skills, nor has she spoken ill about the state of their relationship. In an interview with People in February 2024, she said that everything is fine and dandy between them and that they’ve worked out a system for co-parenting. “Everything is great,” she shared. “We’re [Usher and I] friends and the kids are at an age now where they can kind of say where they want to be as far as, ‘Hey I want to be at Dad’s. I want to go to Mom’s. … We let ’em go where they want to go.”

Usher’s public pledge is a step in the right direction for turning his relationship with Tameka Foster from rocky to rock-solid co-parenting. According to Susan Trombetti, as long as they keep putting in the effort, there’s a good chance they’ll go from civil to actual friends despite their drama-filled history.

“People can always become better co-parents, a better couple, a better person, or a better anything. It’s not great that this is in the past, but it’s never too late to change your behavior for your kids and model the right example,” she explained. “It shows them that you can overcome differences and put them first aside from acknowledging your failures. It’s easy to fall into the negative, and harder to do the right thing. They were able to rise above it and it’s very commendable and big of them.”

In time, they might just achieve the relationship they’ve been aiming for, which would be a win for everyone involved — especially their two children. The fact that Usher says he’s trying is already a promising sign. “They appear to be very united,” Trombetti added. “While they might have differences, they seem to actively work to get beyond it, and that’s a great example.”