Stopping bad thoughts
1. Remember that occasional bad thoughts are normal. This is perhaps the easiest way to start solving your problems. Too often you believe that only you have problems, or that no one understands what you are going through, but bad thoughts are part of life and most importantly they will go away. Don’t beat yourself up over bad thoughts because it’s not your fault.
2. Think about why the idea is “bad”. Why do you get upset at this thought? What sticks in your head? Bad thoughts often persist because you feel guilty, angry, or uncertain about the future, so thinking about why you’ve had the same thought can help you give it shape and find ways to solve the problem. Common reasons for heavy thoughts include:
3. Slow down your thoughts with a few deep breaths. It’s natural to feel anxious or nervous when a bad thought suddenly pops into your brain, but resist the urge to get upset or fixate on it. Spend 30 seconds doing what you are doing and take five deep, long breaths. Take a moment to consider this idea instead of jumping straight to irrational or extreme conclusions.
Alternatively, go outside, leave the room, or take a short walk to clear your head.
4. Ask yourself why you have negative or bad thoughts. Once you slow down and think about why you’re angry, it’s time to ask yourself why the thought is so negative. Good questions include:
Will it matter in 5 years?
5. Stay in the moment. Even if the situation is not ideal or difficult, you can still be okay. You don’t have to let bad thoughts overwhelm you. You can’t control the future and you can’t control the past. What you can do is deal with the present. Many bad thoughts arise from forgetting this fact and anticipating or guessing what is to come.
6. Get your thoughts straight. Your initial reaction to a bad thought will be to overdo it: “I was tempted by another woman, I must not love my wife,” “My boss didn’t like the presentation, I’ll be fired,” “Everyone else has a nice car, I must be a failure.” These ideas are not only simplistic, but often completely wrong. Remember that you are not the center of the universe and that most of the problems in your life will ultimately not mean much to your happiness.
Think back to issues from years past, like being grounded or fired—even though they may have seemed like terrible thoughts at the time, there’s a good chance you’ve long since moved on without any real damage.
7. Distract yourself with something specific that you know gives you comfort. Go back to something you know and love to help take your mind off your problems or give you some perspective. Experiencing something associated with good memories can put a bad thought into perspective – things weren’t always bad and won’t always be bad in the future.
8. Don’t try to run away from your thoughts or “suppress” them. Telling yourself not to think about something is just as good as thinking about it. You spend all your time saying “stop thinking about my breakup” without realizing that you’re still talking about your breakup! You must either shift your thoughts in another direction or try to address the bad thought directly. Trying to consciously push the thought out will only prolong your problems.
9. Work on “letting go” of problems. Instead of fighting bad thoughts, take a deep breath, acknowledge them, and move on. It is difficult to learn, but mastering this skill is the best way to combat negative thoughts for the rest of your life.[7] For example, you may fear that you will be fired because you made a mistake at work. Instead of focusing on what you did wrong, learn from your mistake and take steps to avoid repeating it in the future. Focus on improvement rather than expecting the worst.
10. Literally “throw away your problem”. It may sound strange, but an Ohio State study found that people who wrote down their bad thoughts and then threw the paper away had a better self-image than people who kept the paper. Writing is a way to express your problems, and when you physically release them, you tell your body that it’s time to move on
11. Talk about your bad thoughts with someone you trust. Getting your bad thoughts off your chest and opening up about them is a great way to work through what makes the thought so bad. It also often helps to realize that the idea is not as bad as it seemed. Once you put words to your anxiety, you can get valuable advice and insight from someone who has probably had similar anxieties. Many psychiatrists have found that simply talking about their thoughts in a comfortable environment can be enough to get rid of them.
Bad thoughts basically talk to themselves and everything you say rings true. Another perspective can help you find flaws in your logic and end the thought.
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Breaking the cycle of negative thinking
1. Practice positive affirmations to combat persistent, ugly thoughts. Positive affirmations mean taking the time to recognize that you are happy, healthy, and have a sense of self-worth. Negative thoughts (self-deprecation, unworthiness, etc.) can be helped by positive affirmations. Practice saying “I am…” and go with something you like about yourself, such as “I’m smart,” “I’m good at my job,” or “I’m a loving part of my family.”
Once you become aware of your negative beliefs, you have the power to change them. Instead of thinking, “I’m not good enough,” you can think, “I am enough.
2. Find ways to fill your free time. Most bad thoughts come during periods of downtime when your brain can wander without distraction or when you are exhausted. Find things that will allow you to eliminate too much alone time, such as starting to exercise, starting a writing or art project, or doing community service.
3. Know the people who trigger bad thoughts. Relationships are one of the most challenging and psychologically difficult landscapes to navigate. You may find yourself trying in vain to find out what the other person is thinking, if your friend meant to offend you, or if someone is talking behind your back. However, if you have a friend or significant other who keeps bringing up bad thoughts, it’s not your fault. For whatever reason, this relationship may not be healthy.
4. Be proactive about dealing with bad thoughts. Make a list of all the things you could do to fix your bad thought. For example, if you’re constantly worried about your relationship, ask yourself what you can do to make things more comfortable. Plan a date, buy some flowers for your significant other, talk to your partner and go out with some of your friends to enjoy yourself.
5. Find a creative outlet for your negativity. Writing things down, losing yourself in an instrument, or painting your feelings are valuable ways to explore your negative thoughts and begin to deal with them. Remember to refrain from judging – the point of art is to express your thoughts, not to criticize them. Even if you never show your project to anyone, simply creating it can be a great way to channel your bad thoughts through another outlet.
6. Don’t forget to smile. Smiling has been shown to release chemicals in your body that make you happier. So show off your pearly whites and let the world know you’re happy and you’ll be surprised to see people smile. Between social and chemical reinforcement, it can actually mean the difference between a sunny, happy outlook and being trapped in bad thoughts.
7. If you can’t shake the thoughts, see a professional. If you are suffering from depression, suicidal thoughts, or chronic pain, you should call a mental health professional right away. They are trained to help you on your journey to regaining your positive thoughts and will be there to support you as you learn.
Prevention of bad thoughts.
1. Take care of your body. There is a direct link between mental and physical health and one will suffer if you neglect the other. Make sure you prioritize your body so your brain is well equipped to handle stress and difficult or bad thoughts.
2. Begin a meditation practice. Proven time and time again to promote positive thinking and mental health, meditation is a process of clearing the mind and achieving peace with one’s thoughts. Find 10-15 minutes a day to sit quietly with your thoughts. Focus on your breath and let your thoughts drift freely. As you progress, you will find that you spend more and more time meditating and your bad thoughts will slowly fade into the background.
3. Work on long-term goals. Most people feel that bad thoughts creep into them when they imagine their future, creating stress and uncertainty. Write down your goals and then break them down into small, manageable tasks that are easy to tackle. Celebrate when you reach milestones and always keep your end goal in sight when the going gets tough.
4. Have a sense of humor when facing hardships. Laughing off accidents and misfortunes is one of the best ways to stay sharp and healthy. Humor positively “resets” negative events and ends stress and worry. Laughter will give you much-needed insight into your thoughts and make it easier to keep bad thoughts at bay.
5. Find a friend or family member you can be honest with. Just knowing there is someone you can be open and honest with can make bad thoughts a lot less daunting. Building trust with someone takes time and you will need to be a little vulnerable and share your fears with another person, but this bond will eventually help you realize that you are not alone. You can deal with your bad thoughts as they arise, and there will be someone there to help you. Follow:
