POP star Liam Payne secretly spent 100 days in a wellness clinic in the US last year after hitting rock bottom.
The 29-year-old said he no longer recognised himself after lashing out at everyone around him as he struggled to navigate life post-One Direction.
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During his time in the Louisiana centre, which specialises in helping people deal with past trauma, he was cut off from the outside world after handing in his phone.
And he found solace in art and poetry.
The decision to seek professional help was supported by his ex — former Girls Aloud singer Cheryl, 40, who is mother to their six-year-old son Bear.
Liam, who marks six months of being sober this week, has credited Cheryl with helping him get his life back on track.
He said: “There is a point when you hit rock bottom and you realise you have got to do something different as whatever you are doing right now isn’t working for you.
“I was in bad shape up until that point.
“Honestly, more than anything I want to say thank you to Bear and his mum for giving me a little bit of freedom to go and get well.
“There is no point trying to be a dad when you have nothing to teach.
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“I feel like I have a grip on life now. After I got back out, that process had worked for me, but there were still some little bits left that I kind of had to deal with myself.”
The turning point for Liam, who is now seeing 23-year-old American influencer Kate Cassidy, came in May last year after a car-crash interview with YouTuber Logan Paul.
In it, Liam took aim at his former 1D band mate Zayn Malik and challenged fellow pop star Justin Bieber to a fight as he sipped neat whisky.
The former X Factor star said via his YouTube channel: “I needed to take some time out for myself. I kind of became someone who I didn’t really recognise any more.
“I was so angry at what was going on around me that instead of taking a look inwards I decided to take it outwards on everybody else.
“It was wrong really, and my own frustrations with my own career. I want to apologise for that.
“The rest of the boys have really stuck by me and when I needed them most they kind of came to my rescue, even Zayn.
“It was hard for me to watch back. It is one of those life-changing moments that saved my life in a way.”
Liam said of his drinking: “The party is over.”
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