Reality star Amber Borzotra revealed Wednesday that she was recently diagnosed with autism.
“It’s been so hard, and I’ve had to figure out why I am this person and why my whole life, I’ve felt the way I’ve felt and I am this way,” the 35-year-old shared on Part 2 of the “The Challenge” Season 38 reunion.
“It’s difficult finding out later also in life,” she added. “I wish I would have found out sooner because I’ve struggled with my identity for 34 years.”
Borzotra shared that some of the difficulties she experienced while filming MTV’s reality competition show led her to seek help from a medical professional.
“I struggle in social settings and this pressure has been so much on me, and I’ve taken meds for depression and anxiety in this game,” the model said. “It was embarrassing for people to make it seem like it wasn’t working, so it was something deeper.
Borzotra said her doctors were able to come to the conclusion that she was autistic because she exhibited behaviors found in those with the disorder such as “mirroring” and “masking.”
“Basically, I camouflage myself to fit in,” the TV star, who first rose to fame on Season 16 of CBS’s “Big Brother,” explained. “So, if I see someone doing something, I feel I have to mirror that.”
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She added, “Like I ‘stim’ a lot. I don’t know if you guys know — I, like, rub my hands or I bite my lip or twirl my hair.”
According to medical experts, “stimming” refers to a pattern of repetitive behaviors that people with autism do in order to help them regulate their emotions or provide “someone with a source of comfort or enjoyment that enables them to carry on with their day.”
Borzotra concluded by sharing that being outspoken about her diagnosis has given her the “chance to embrace this amazing person I am.”
She said, “I want to just be a good influence to other neuro-divergent people out there. You can do whatever you want. I mean, I’m here. It feels good to be myself and I just want you guys to know that this is me.”
Borzotra has competed on three seasons of “The Challenge,” and walked away with the first place prize of $450,000 on “The Challenge: Double Agents” in 2021.
The German-born beauty is also expecting her first child with boyfriend Chauncey Palmer, who competed alongside her on the most recent season of “The Challenge: Ride or Dies.”
