Nick Cannon is “mentally and spiritually … broken” one year after the death of his and Alyssa Scott’s son, Zen.
“Been tossing and turning all night, and as much as I know I need rest, last night I couldn’t sleep at all,” the “Wild ‘N Out” host wrote via Instagram on Monday. “I can’t believe it’s been a year already since the toughest day of my life occurred.”
Cannon, 42, described the “painful anniversary,” writing, “Losing a child has to be the heaviest, most dark and depressive experiences that I will never get over. A mixture of guilt, pain, and sorrow is what I suppress daily.
“I am far from perfect and often fall short and make decisions in my life that many question, but anyone who knows me knows my heart,” the “Masked Singer” host continued.
“I love hard, I love big and I love with my entire Heart and Soul and I just wish my Little Man could’ve felt more of that love while he was here on Earth.”
Cannon, who is “physically … on the mend” after being hospitalized for pneumonia, went on to request prayers from his followers.
“💔Continue to Peacefully Rest My Son, Zen Scott Cannon,” he concluded. “We Love you Eternally ❤️🩹🙏🏾.”
The “All That” alum and Scott, 29, welcomed their son in June 2021, and the little one lost his battle with brain cancer that December.
The model told her Instagram followers in October that she is pregnant with her third baby, with Cannon confirming his paternity the following month.
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Scott, who is also the mother of daughter Zeela, 4, from a previous relationship, clarified in November that she is in the “final month” of her pregnancy..
Cannon has welcomed four other children this year — son Legendary, 5 months, with Bre Tiesi and daughter Onyx, 2 months, with Lanisha Cole, followed by son Rise, 2 months, with Brittany Bell and daughter Beautiful, 3 weeks, with Abby De La Rosa.
The “Drumline” star is also the father of twins Moroccan and Monroe, 11, with ex-wife Mariah Carey, as well as son Golden, 5, and daughter Powerful, 1, with Bell and twins Zion and Zillion, 1, with De La Rosa.
When asked by Billboard last month whether he sees more children in his future, Cannon said he has “no idea.”
The actor explained, “I don’t know, man. I think I’m good right now.”
