Paris Olympics Opening Ceremonies Were a Declaration of War on All Religions

Dr. Rachel Gunn turned in literally the worst performance in modern Olympic history, getting a perfect 0.0 in each of her three breakdancing competitions — but did she cheat to crowd out competitors from her home country of Australia?





The Aussie “b-girl” became an instant hit in her native land, probably in no small part because the whole country is feeling slap-happy after bringing home a record 18 gold medals. So why not cheer the woman whose routine — including her patented “kangaroo paw” move — became instant meme fodder and the butt of late night jokes?

Maybe she’ll be less of a hit back home if the allegations against her turn out to be true.

Before we get to the serious stuff, please, I’m begging you, let me show you the best of the worst (or is that the worst of the best) videos and memes of the woman who wants you to call her Raygun. 

If you missed any of her, uh, performances, they all went about like this.

I sent one of these clips to my 18-year-old and told him, “In all fairness, breakdancing only arrived in Australia about six months ago.”

Somebody added the Seinfeld music but that’s only fair because Raygun — I feel sick when I use her “cool” name — breakdances as well as Seinfeld’s Elaine Benes danced.





And so a thousand memes blossomed.

This first one uses the (in)famous “kangaroo paw” move.

Karate Kid? I’m in.

 I could do this all day but I promised you some actual news, so here it is.

According to a petition on Change.org:

Rachel Gunn, who set up her own governing body for breakdancing, has manipulated the selection process to her own advantage. Despite the clear talent and qualification of other outstanding female breakdancers like G Clef and Holy Molly, they were unfairly overlooked. The NT Youlong Boys, a group of incredibly talented and underprivileged youth from the Northern Territory, were denied crucial funding by Dr. Gunn to attend the qualifiers—a decision that directly impacted their chance to showcase their skills on a national stage.

Disturbingly, Dr. Gunn went on to win her own qualifier, defeating other phenomenal breakdancers, raising serious questions about the fairness and integrity of the process. If Dr. Gunn’s husband is indeed the Australian coach and part of the selection panel, this represents a blatant conflict of interest that cannot go unchecked.





Why do such a thing? One theory is that Gunn might have just wanted to go on an all-expenses-paid Paris vacation.

It doesn’t matter what sex someone might or might not be because that’s what industry professionals call “a d*** move.”

The memes are funny. But if the allegations are true, then Gunn’s appearance at the Paris Olympics was no laughing matter — and whoever paid for her trip needs to be reimbursed at Gunn’s expense. 

Recommended: The Unthinkable Just Became Thinkable for Google


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